I'm A Mood Writer

What does that mean? Some people make reading selections based on their moods… that's how I write. I have to feel it. Perhaps it can be traced back to when I began writing consistently.

In high school, I wrote short stories. I was trying to purge the sadness and rage from my heart. Being fifteen, well that was reason enough, but constantly losing friends to gun violence and deep-seated anger with my estranged father were a literary trifecta. I lashed out on the page. Sometimes, it was my burgeoning militancy that took over. And sometimes it was poetry.

At Temple University I leaned into the poetry. I felt a freedom that I hadn’t felt before - not like the students who never got to experience anything, then run wild - but I definitely felt a weightlessness not burdened with my heavy personal details. But it was short-lived.

My fiancé was shot to death by his best friend's nephew. It happened a few weeks before I was due to return to Philly for my junior year. Poetry literally saved me because I went crazy. I don't use that word lightly or in jest. That is the best word that I can come up with for my mind, at that time. Functional, yes stable, no. But the words gave me something concrete. Writing was my tether to reality. I wrote all the time. No sleeping or eating, just writing. That continued until I was able to pull my head above water.

I wrote poetry for over 25 years. Stacks of journals lived beside my bed for when inspiration struck. I never quite learned to carry one with me, however, which is odd. I was always reduced to a stray receipt or tearing a corner from a communication from my children's school.

Nothing has changed. I'm still a mood writer. I've just added novels into the mix. Some call me a pantser because I don't plan out my books, but follow where the story takes me. I don't know what's going to happen when I begin writing. It is exhilarating!

I'm a mood writer.